Beyond the Margins’ new ‘In Conversation’ series will bring queer people in various parts of Africa together to discuss issues pertinent to them. For the first in this series, Ghana’s Angel Maxine and South Africa’s Umlilo unpack their lives as transgender artists.
Describing herself as a “genre- and gender-bending multi-disciplinary artist”, Umlilo is the founder of Future Kwaai Records, co-founder of Johannesburg’s LeGrand Queer Arts Festival in Johannesburg and a musician whose music has garnered over half a million streams.
In this conversation, she speaks to Angel Maxine, Ghana’s first openly transgender musician. A fearless advocate for LGBTIQA+ rights, Maxine’s song song, Kill the Bill, was written in opposition to Ghana’s Anti-LGBT Bill. She is currently living in Berlin after having fled Ghana due to persecution based on her gender identity.
Here, the two artists speak about their music and activism, the increased anti-queer rhetoric sweeping across the continent, and how music can be used as an agent of change.
Umlilo: How are you, Angel? Is Berlin treating you well?
Angel Maxine: Berlin is treating me so well, to be honest, because this is the first time I kind of experience a form of freedom, you know, of being myself, of being able to take the public transport, being able to walk on the street freely. I haven’t been [on] public transport for very long. Like, years…I’m so happy, you know, that nobody recognises me. Nobody even cares. Everybody is just free and living their lives. I’m so happy for it.
Umlilo: I feel like I can relate so much to that because I feel like when I’m in Europe, it’s where I can really kind of be myself, fully. And be anonymous. Which I love…It’s the same thing in South Africa. I’m not a person who’s generally out and about a lot of the time, but people are so in your business and you can’t walk the streets without people looking at you and talking to you and, you know…So I’ve noticed that there’s like a huge difference when I get on the plane and I’m in another country, I can just be. And it’s just something so special that I think many people are not even aware of in their own countries.
Angel Maxine: Yes. Honestly, I will say in Ghana it was a very, very tough time for me. Sometimes I sit down and I cry. When I’m here and I’m walking freely on the street, sometimes I shed some tears…because, [in Ghana], I was not even able to go grocery shopping. Because, you know, I am an openly trans woman. A lot of people know me and the activism that I do. I speak against the ills that have been meted [out against] LGBT people…Also being a musician who is using these things as songs made my life very, very vulnerable. So it has to be a life that is quite expensive and not so easy to sustain. Because I can’t be on public transport anymore. It’s either I get a car or I’m in an Uber. I have a special person who will take me out all the time, and that costs so much money. As an artist…nobody wants to invite me because I am a queer woman. I’m a trans woman…Nobody wants to, you know, associate themselves with me. So coming here, I’ve also found my value as an artist. I was telling my mom, ‘You know what? You’re the only person I miss in Ghana.’ I’ll say that. Like, I don’t miss the life I lived in Ghana. I miss my mother, I miss my friends, I miss my community. But aside [from] that, I don’t miss the sadness and, you know, being in your room and thinking that somebody is looking at you through the window, you know? I don’t miss those things. I just miss the beautiful human beings that are back home.
Umlilo: It’s really interesting because I feel like there [are] so many parallels. Even though, you know, South Africa is a little bit different from Ghana in the sense that we are more of a free society and LGBTQ+ rights are recognised here. But on a day-to-day basis, everything that you describe is everything that I and a lot of my trans friends have to go through. And you almost consider yourself lucky if you’re able to pass in this society, because you don’t get bothered as necessarily a queer or trans person. But you still will get bothered because you are a woman.
And there are certain things that come with that. And I think that’s maybe what a lot of cishet women don’t realise is that we’re kind of all in the same boat because they still have to deal with catcalling. They still have to deal with walking around and navigating this world in fem bodies and the consequences that that has. A lot of us trans people also have to experience that.
And, you know, it’s interesting to me that, regardless of whether you’re in a society that embraces queer identity or not…you can’t really experience the full scope of being a human being and having all of the rights that should be afforded [you] when you’re born into this world. And then you add being an artist. Like, everything you were talking about: not being able to go and be invited to certain things or collaborate with certain people or be around certain spaces.
And I’m by no means comparing my experiences – or South African experiences – to what’s happening in Ghana at the moment, because obviously it’s very, very different. But there are these little similarities that I think a lot of people, wherever you are, can relate to. Even in Europe, if you’re in a small town and not in a city like Berlin, the vibe changes. It’s kind of like, you know, you become like an outsider.
Angel Maxine: It’s true…I chose to stay in Berlin because I felt Berlin was more queer-friendly. Very diverse and artistic. There are so many artists here. And I can get to know some people and start to build a career from here, instead of Ghana. Because nobody listens to my songs in Ghana. Ghanaians do not like me. I have been attacked so many times…It just kills your vibe. Kills who you are. And, you see, our elderly queer people [in Ghana] – who are not strong enough to say, ‘This is me. This is what I want to be. Nobody can tell me my feelings are wrong.’ – they are the ones who have really suffered. You see them and it’s painful. I see elderly queer people who are not able to live their lives…It comes with a lot of low self-esteem and makes [them] conform to society. To be proud of yourself and stand strong comes with so much radicality and [an] ‘I don’t give a damn’ [attitude]. So, I look at the elderly queer people and I tell myself, ‘No, I can’t. I don’t want to be like this. I don’t want to live a life of always living in regret.’ For me, coming out to the public – coming out on TV and on radio and in Ghana, doing all my activism, my music and all that – was to create the awareness that there are other potentials in queer people. Because people just see us as sex objects. When you say ‘LGBT’, it’s sex.
They will not come and say, ‘Oh, LGBT lawyer, LGBT doctor, LGBT artist’. No. It is just sex and anal sex and a man and a man sleeping together and a woman and a woman. That’s the only thing. I felt that there was a need to change the narrative. [To] challenge them and tell them that, ‘Hey, nobody walks around having sex. We also have our lives. We are also beautiful.
We are intelligent. We are smart. If you talk, we can also talk…Let’s look at the positive side of us and not always sex.’ And I think that this is why some parents are not able to support their children. Because they are afraid.
Umlilo: Yeah, exactly. It creates this, like, generational cycle, because the parents also have trauma of having to be in these very narrow beliefs that are very much coming from a colonial perspective that brought in this Christianity. And it’s very sad because I even see it here in South Africa. People now say, ‘Oh, it’s very un-African to be queer’ and completely negate the history of a lot of African societies, which were not very monotheistic societies. It was very diverse with different identities. Everybody had a role to play in those communities. And then you have something like colonialism happening and importing this hate and these laws that…weren’t there before colonisation. If homosexuality and queer identity and all of these things were a sin or a crime or a cultural thing, why were they not outlawed before Europeans came to Africa? No one asks those questions. No one asks themselves, where does this belief that I must hate this person come from? It’s very sad because I think it shows the world that Africa is this lost continent. That we don’t know who we are, because all of our decisions are never for the betterment of our people. We’re so hardwired with this colonial thinking that it’s almost like the colonial project actually won.
And I think it’s very clear when you look at Ghana and Uganda, currently. When the Uganda situation was happening, you know, we were all kind of rallying up in Johannesburg when the [Anti-Homosexuality] Bill was being passed over there. It was really interesting to see the South African community come out in support and solidarity, raising funds and doing all this stuff. I got to perform at one of the fundraising events, and we were talking about the fear that this might spread to other countries, especially Uganda-adjacent countries. And a lot of us were like, ‘No, is it possible? Like, would countries influence each other like that?’ And now, watching what’s happening, I’m like, oh, it’s actually happening. Each of these countries are influencing the next one and the next one and the next one. And it’s basically creating this very, very dangerous rhetoric and structure within all of these countries. We were talking about how South Africa has a huge role to play. You know, the South African government is involved in African politics. When there are wars and other stuff, they’re very quick to say, ‘This is not right.’ So they very much put themselves as advocates of human rights. But it’s interesting how even our president has kept so quiet around the anti-LGBT bills that are being passed. And it just goes to show that they don’t see our lives as something that matters, which means they don’t see their lives as something that matters because they don’t see the connection that, if we’re losing our rights it’s inevitable that they will lose their rights eventually. Because if somebody can just say ‘Being you is illegal and now we’re going to put you to jail’, there’s nothing stopping them from adding to that list, you know.
Angel Maxine: Exactly. And funny enough, all these bills that are spreading like wildfire in Africa are being sponsored by America…
Umlilo: Yes, right-wing, Christian, Republican, conservative evangelists.
Angel Maxine: Yes. In Ghana, the Bill is being sponsored by the World Congress of Families. It’s an American [coalition] that will come and tell us how we should live our Ghanaian culture. That we should take love out of our culture and introduce hate. I see that and I’m like, how do people who say they are a Christian religion group come together and create such kinds of bills?…The sad part is, in Ghana, this year is a year of elections and the LGBT issue has become what the politicians are using as their campaign tool. When there are issues in Ghana, pertinent issues [related to] the needs of Ghanaians, they’ll bring [up] the LGBT [issue]. Then everybody will come out saying, ‘We don’t like them. A man and a man who want to marry. We don’t want them to marry. We’ll kill them. We’ll destroy them.’…Then they will use that to cause confusion [and] get away with their corruption. And it’s sad that the queer community, who are in the minority and who haven’t done anything wrong to anybody [and] who are so vulnerable, have to go through this…And it really saddens my heart, honestly. It really, really, really, really saddens my heart. We have tried. Activists have come out. We have spoken. But these people, they just want to be wicked…Like, why? Why?…I was in South Africa in 2021 – or 2019, I don’t know when… but I felt an amount of peace there because nobody really looks at me. I was getting a lot of boyfriends when I was in South Africa.
Umlilo: (Laughs) Yaaas! Living!
Angel Maxine: And they still write to me and I say, ‘Don’t worry I’m going to come back for you.’ (Laughs). I felt a certain amount of peace there in South Africa. I felt that the people were inclusive and there was no judgement. People are living openly as queer people, even though I know it’s not 100% safe. But there are some spaces that are quite secure and even the law can speak for you. But we don’t have that in Ghana. That is one of the saddest, saddest, saddest things. You know, if you’re not rich in Africa and you’re a queer person, and you want to live your life openly, be ready to go to prison…Yes. It’s only the rich people who are able to live their life. They are the people who, in case anything happens, their parents are flying them on the next available flight.
But we who don’t have that; we who don’t have that capacity…Like, the queer people in Ghana right now…I am in Berlin and I am telling you the nice experiences I am having. What about those people who do not have the capacity to come here to come and feel this way, you know?
So it’s a matter of real concern. As activists, we really need to amplify our voices each and every day.
Umlilo: We have so much work [to do] and I’m actually excited that we get to kind of meet [you] and chat and exchange because it starts like this. I was actually listening to ‘Kill the Bill’. I absolutely love it…
Angel Maxine: You know, it was a song to tell people…about the dangers of the Bill. [That] they shouldn’t just look at the Bill as if it affects only the LGBT community, [because] it affects every Ghanaian.
It becomes stressful talking every day about one thing; educating people. But if it’s a song, everybody listens. Like, it gets into everybody’s home. People who do not even like me will still listen to the song. I have some friends who say, ‘Angel, come and take your song out of my head.’ (Laughs). And I hope that that is exactly what it does to the homophobic people. Let it stay in their head, you know. (Laughs)
Umlilo: Exactly. I think the power of music to really have a positive message is something that we often overlook. It’s the one thing that connects so many people from different cultures [and] backgrounds. And sometimes we sleep on this very powerful artistic tool of change. And I was so happy that you were the conduit of that change in your country, because most of the time people are so fearful. We were talking about how people don’t want to associate with the queer community, or they’re too scared. Like, ‘What if people think I’m queer.’ So people are always in this fear state, and we need artists like yourself, artists like me, who are kind of not afraid to speak the truth and to expose the things that we go through. Because that’s how we learn, and that’s how we can connect to other people. So I’m super proud that you were fearless and made the song. Because not only is it catchy and really fun to listen to, it’s giving some really important information about what is happening in Ghana – not only for Ghanaians, but also for other African people, other people in the world. So I just want to say kudos and thank you so much for that.
Angel Maxine: Thanks. Thank you. And I also want to know the kind of music you do and the message you send. And you know what goes into, you know, doing your music. How are you able to navigate the lyrics? What inspires you to do what you do? I watched some nice clips of yours, and I was like, Oh my goodness, this is so beautiful. I really, really want to know how you navigate…And also, if possible, we could even collaborate together on a song…
Umlilo: Yeah! I was thinking about it. We definitely have to do something. It will be so fun.
Angel Maxine: Some nice beats. Give them a nice beat, you know, and give them the message as well.
Umlilo: There we go. You know, that’s what I’m about…In my career, I started from a place of need and depression and heartache and heartbreak. What my sound encapsulated was this almost sad, but confident, queer experience of South Africa. And I was very much writing about my experiences of living in Johannesburg, which is kind of like you have two worlds in one. You have this affluent, amazing, wealthy and extravagant side. You know, the City of Gold. And then you have the other side, which is degradation, slums and neglect of our city. And it’s dangerous and there’s crime. So I’ve always been living between these two worlds. And I think that’s where I came from, writing my music in the beginning. But now that I’m a little bit older and I’ve really come into my identity, I really have been wanting to make music that is provocative in a different kind of way. Like, I still love dance music. I want people to dance, but I’ve been feeling a lot more sensual and, like, not caring. Maybe it’s being in my 30s. I just don’t care anymore what people think. So I’m able to write different kinds of songs and get into my sexuality and write about sex and all of these other things that I think, in the past, I used to be scared about going too in-your-face. Now, I’m like, I don’t care. It’s part of who we are as people.
Angel Maxine: That is it. I think we can even write a very nice, sex-positive [song]…Because we don’t really talk about our relationships. It’s hard for us to really come up and talk about our relationships and be like, Oh my God, I had a boyfriend and this and that.’ [For] trans women there’s no space for us to really talk about our relationships. Talk about our sex life…I really love what you’re saying. You just want to be free and explore.
Umlilo: You’re taught to hate yourself. You know, you’re taught to hate your sexual side from a young age…Every single day, we fight to be who we are. We fight through the voices in our heads saying, ‘You’re not good enough’. All of these things that we have to unlearn.
Angel Maxine: And people don’t get it…My friend was telling me, ‘Angel, you are always late.’ …I said, ‘Look, my life as a trans woman [comes] with a lot of calculations. Before I step out of my house, I have to think [whether] I’m coming back home safely; if I’m coming back as I went out. I have to sit down and think of all the things. The anxiety I’m going to go through. Is somebody looking at me? Is this place looking like this? Did the make-up patch up well?’ You have to be so perfect, and now [strengthen] your mind to face the world. And that is what I have to go through all the time, every day. People don’t get it. The life we live is not that easy. It’s not sweet. It’s hard. It’s tough.
Umlilo: It’s very tough! Sometimes I look back to a time in my life where I could leave the house and not care. I think about when I was a kid and I could just go and play with other kids, because there was no difference between boy and girl. You all haven’t gone through puberty. That’s the time I think about a lot: where things [were] so much easier. And now there is that expectation. I’m so happy you spoke about it. Sometimes I think I’m going crazy by myself when I’m leaving the house. Like, am I the only person that does this? That changes [their] outfit five times and [does their] makeup 100 times and, like, change this, change that.
Angel Maxine: You are not the only person. I go through this all the time. All the time…I’ve been telling people [that] being a trans person, you don’t need make-up…But, this is me who is not able to come out without looking the way society expects me to look, because I am a woman and society expects me to be some curvy woman, some woman with wobbling breasts, that might have some long nails, some this, some that. Like it becomes a burden.
One other thing is, to sustain it, it’s not easy…I keep telling some of the young trans people, ‘If you can’t sustain this, don’t start it. Don’t do it. Wait for the point when you know that you have the capacity to [do it]…’ It comes with a lot of responsibility, to always be like this all the time. And it even takes a toll on your mental health at a point. It’s a lot…It’s really a lot to be us. It’s a lot to be a trans woman…I always say there’s still [a lot of] internalised homophobia in our LGBTQ community…People say, ‘Oh, as trans women we overdo [things]. We are the cause of people attacking us because we…have chosen to dress like a woman. ‘You are the reason why there are these Bills. You are the reason why we are being attacked.’ No! And it comes from our own queer community as well. So the pressure comes from…
[Photo: Eemmax Experience]
Umlilo: All angles. Everywhere…You know, I’ve thoroughly enjoyed this whole conversation that we’ve been having. I feel like we need more of this. We need bigger circles with other queer, trans, non-binary people from all over. And I feel like Africa is at a time now where we really need to connect as much as we can. And kind of put all of our heads together, because I don’t think we’re going to be able to fight things by ourselves. We have to operate as a large community worldwide. That’s the only way we can get stuff done. I was thinking about the queer icon, Harvey Milk, who, you know, fought for queer rights in America at a very different time. And what he was always advocating is that when people see more of us and realise that we are your sisters. We are your aunts, brothers, cousins. We are your doctors, lawyers, psychologists, and astronauts. We are part of society. And I feel like, the more people see us in them, that common humanity is where we could really start having much more positive conversations from the heart and not just operating from a colonised brain…I [also] hope that we get to do a song together. I think that will be so fire! And much needed. We need a trans anthem.
Angel Maxine: Exactly! We need it. We need an anthem. We need an anthem for us, like specifically for African trans women…I always say that the people who were born here in Europe, and people who were born in Africa, even though we are queer people, we are all different, because what we go through [in Africa], they just read about it and just hear stories. It’s not in their skin. So, it’s good that we, as African trans women, can come together as a force…Let us come out as trans women, as artists, and collaborate. That is how we can build this community.
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